It is because, everything that have happened left permanent footprints in my heart and my memory.
No matter how I find ways to washed it away, it is always a permanent stains.
What more can I do?
Whenever I'm not in discomfort, I seem to affect the others,
I have got no choice.
With the same position, same situation, same feeling,
I gotta turn it to something,
Which I don't feel like showing,
Though is not an easy path for me,
Neither I want to show how much I sacrifice,
Or I seem to be like a heroine,
I never seek for all these,
All I want are SMILES,
But I know I can never satisfy everyone.
No matter how much I do,
It'll never be enough,
Sometimes, it is sad to say,
But that is the fact,
that no matter what you do,
You are just not appreciated.
I am born with the heart of sensitivity,
I can detect mostly, most of the time,
Sometimes, I wish I could just born without it,
Cause the more I see, the more I wish I could be blind.
But that's not how life should goes,
I'm taking it as a challenge,
I'm fated to be in this life,
I just cant hide.
Even though people say,
Alcohol can helps,
IT IS A TOTALLY FAKE!
All I can do,
All I have been doing,
All I can go as far as I can,
Till the edge,
I don't mind,
I'm making myself as flexible as possible.
For being flexible, the thorns in your hand do not hurt much.
But how true can it be?
It aches too somehow.
But, I try to forget the pain,
Does that means I'm pretending,
I don't think so.
Cause I'll find my ways,
Keeping myself alive.
Letting the diamond off but then at the same time, I feel the thorn.
So all I can do,
Is try to adapt the changes,
Watching you from afar,
Keeping you safe from falling the edge.
Once again, I'm not writing myself to be like a heroine.
It is just me.
Though I wish I could be there to share the ups and downs,
But I know, I will never be.
For I know I can never provide anymore comfort and happiness to you, my friend.
How I regret it,
How much pain for me to accept the fact,
For to me,
Is just a big failure of a friend to a friend.
However, I have never give up.
I've always try to jump as high as possible to reach your level.
Hopping that I can make it through...
I'll get tired.
But it will come to a time,
I need a break.
I'm just to tired.
I know it is not fair for you,
But I got no choice,
I really need to let loose myself a little.
For I am still a human,
Even machines need a rest.
They can break down,
What more, I'm a human.